That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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