Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

thumb_up thumb_down -13

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

thumb_up thumb_down -17

whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I like jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -137

A baby seal walks in to a club

thumb_up thumb_down +72

What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops