What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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I hate you.

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Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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what is brown and sticky? a stick

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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YO mama so stupid, when she got hit by a bus she said WHO THREW THAF ROCK AT ME.

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Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Popsicles

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what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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