Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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A boy with red hair is happy.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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BIG PENIS

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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Lockerbie bombing

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

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hahaha

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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