A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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swag

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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