So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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stinky boner

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

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All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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