Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Dude man, I'm high...

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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