Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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Why did the boy fail math? He got bad grades.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

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what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Q What happened to the kid with diabetis and a one legged mom A. He got hit by a bus

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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