What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Knock Knock! F*ck off

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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