What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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what's worse than a dead baby? a pile of dead babies. what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath? the live one has to eat it's way out. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out? more dead babies dumped on the already existing pile. what's worse than the giant pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out, but there are more dead babies piled on top? this is all in your basement.

whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

call me maybe.

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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