Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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son, you're adopted.

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why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

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How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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GooglePlus.

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Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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Carlton

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

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A black guy walks in to a bar.

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Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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