What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Goat balls.

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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