If life hands you lemons Take them

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

No joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Chuck Norris died.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

thumb_up thumb_down +2

your fat

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Is Carly smart? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black woman and an Asian woman are both driving their cars. They arrive safely at their respective destinations.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down

arse

thumb_up thumb_down

Womens Sports

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops