Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

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Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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what does an adhd kid that causes all kind of trouble get? a buncha ass whoopins and some meds to dope his ass up

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

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A man goes to the potty.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

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What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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