What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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star wars kid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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