After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

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One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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