How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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What's the diffrents between a horse and a zebra? WELL clearly there names duh.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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guess what? bannanas

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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