A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What do Jay Williams, Lebron James, Candace Parker and Maya Moore have in common? They were all winners of the Morgan Wootten Player of the Year Award.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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