A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

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what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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