Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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To mama so old, she might die soon.

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Every time a bell rings an angel gets it's wings. What they don't tell you is every time a mouse trap snaps an angel gets set on fire.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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