How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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Ubisoft presents a game by ubisoft

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

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. . I am a whale

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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