How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

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Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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