Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

GEOVANI is a queer that dosen't believe me

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

Women's rights

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

I Love Hitler.

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

Laura Pratz..

What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

Why did the woman die Because she was old

Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

There are two kinds of people: Those who have a life, and those who read anti-jokes

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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