Paper or plastic? Yes...

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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