There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Apple hates Blackberry.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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Knock Knock the door's open, come in

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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