What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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One, two, three, four and five

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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Yes

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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