What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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kathryn atkins

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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Pickles

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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Chuck Norris.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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