An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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