A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

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What's the difference between a horse and a chicken? They're different species and also the chicken is female, while the horse I was referring to is male.

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the most interesting man in the world refuse to eat his buttered toast? It just so happens that the cook accidentally used stale bread, causing it to taste unsatisfactory.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Donald Trump

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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