Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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what did the black women name her child jamaal

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops