Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

i'm hard

i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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