WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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