an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

Pickles

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

Small Penis.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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