Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

thumb_up thumb_down +20

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +18

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops