Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

" I can't here you it's too dark!"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock Nobody's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

DERP

thumb_up thumb_down +9

"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops