Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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Knock Knock the door's open, come in

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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How high is the sky? True or False

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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