I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

woman's rights

You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

What do you call a black man in church? Religious

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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