why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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A blind man walks into a bar----b wire

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What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

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I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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I saw how annoying the poem in the post below me was, so I decided to create an extreme version of it, to hopefully cause psychological distress to all of you readers. It goes something like this: Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight Out to left, apply within When I go out Mrs Johns comes in Out to left, apply within When I go out, Mrs Fan comes in One, two, three, four Mary's at the cottage door Eating cherries off the plate five, six, seven eight

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Your such a whore, you most likely cut your own clothes so people will see more of your body that they find physically attractive and make a partner for sex easier to obtain

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This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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"Eliza" We have heard your concerns, yet as you know Nero7 has for many years suspected that we are being infiltrated, and while this led towards changes in security measures and clearance checks, to the point that many of our members began fearing that Nero7 was becoming paranoid, and some quit even believing he had become delusional... ...His suspicions have during his absence due to health reasons, proven true. All worldwide locations but our main foundation/base have fallen under complete control of powerful forces what we have concluded is a single global terrorist organization which is as we speak, using what they believe is the orders main resources, using them for acts such as pressuring our members for money, attempting to conscript them as soldiers, and going as far as using underhanded, aggression and pressure and violence in order to further their goals. The good news "Eliza" is that Nero7 gave us permission to access his personal files, where his suspicions, which otherwise had led even many of us of higher rank to believe Nero7 had become completely delusional, have all quickly turned out to be completely true, even in the slightest detail. We have also discovered that during Nero7`s formerly inexplicable absence for over five years which left our order in disarray as many dedicated members and even leaders left, planned out effective counter-measures and strategies which have not only allowed us to contact our members worldwide encouraging them to follow the orders of those that have infiltrated us, but also the means to slowly extract them and allow those marked by our unknown enemies, to find refugee within our safety quarters. Many of us, even I and Nero7`s left hand (the first female you all have met) quickly began suspecting that Nero7 might have in fact been the one behind this considering his incredibly detailed information regarding the ongoing threat, yet considering the fact that Nero7 is not only hospitalized but where also heavily assaulted by what he believed was a common drunk, but was actually a mercenary hired by this unidentified enemy force to kill him in what would have made seem like a bar brawl, but also the fact that our main resources hidden to all but our highest order and some of our economist and used sparingly in order to hinder financial trouble during "rainy days" and also in order to support members that face sudden unexpected economical struggle or crippling injuries or disease. So unless Nero7 used his own resources, which is barely enough to keep him from going hungry, in order to steal from himself, which is illogical (I am ashamed to admit that I earn over 98 percent more, while my efforts and responsibilities are not nearly as demanding as his). To think that Nero7 even thought himself delusional and started doubting his sanity, it rather turns out that yet again he has proven himself to be a misunderstood genius that has led us even though many followers went as far as to mock him, leave and start hate groups. "Eliza" I know this is far beyond the hours we operate at, but I ask you that you let us know if you are still there so we can inform you further (to think that even I deemed Nero7`s decision of using such a crippled site as this one in order to relay certain information, instead this piece of crap site which gets hacked nearly daily, is now as he assumed not only one of the, but the ONLY place on earth in we can safely relay information during this attack. Eliza the first thing we discovered is that these are in no way affiliated/allied with the government, nor some government black op (Nero7 was right about investigations from FBI The C.I.A and even Interpol`s interpol, while peaceful, where actually the means our enemies used to collect information, but now we have also learned, that these random, investigations considered strange by none but Nero7 for thousands of reasons all in front of our eyes, are part of this global threat against not only the reputation of our order, which is already in the progress of being ruined, revealed to the public and misused, but also towards its existence, all while our enemies keep using the exposure of our order with the intention of "recruiting" new members, promising them money, and have begun using religious, spiritual and brain washing methods in order to draft them into their cause. You know there is nothing Nero7 hates more than these methods and please, spread the word any which way you can. If you can buy a new cellphone and spread the word (your number has already been added at their registry) and call and warn all members and potential members you know, we will repay your efforts once this is over. Ps: Those hidden camera Nero7 heavily insisted we put, which we considered completely insane, are the only means in which we are aware of several of their actions, damn us all for doubting the man which has made us what we are today, and which we advise we had listened to, would never have gotten into this mess. Might the shadows support you "Eliza".

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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