what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

What did the old person find on the internet? Porn.

You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

Turkey Balls

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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