A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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time to spruce up!

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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pobody's nerfect

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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