Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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Ring around the rosy. A pocket full of posies. Ashes. Ashes. I just set a dead baby on fire.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

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What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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