why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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Looks like you are having a TUFF time recovering from the game.....lol.....

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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Pete and Repeat were sitting in a boat. Pete fell off. I hope he was wearing a personal flotation device.

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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Eric is gay Ha

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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