Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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