A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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american idol

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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star wars kid

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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