An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

Whose your daddy? Not me

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

You know what's natural? Bears.

Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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