Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

A person with OCD walked into a abr.

What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

No joke.

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

what did the noob say to the gamer your a gamer nooob

You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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