A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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