A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

Why did the Muslim man get on a plane? Because he was going on vacation

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

Stop driving smart cars you fags

Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

You wanna hear a joke? Your dick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Chuck Norris.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...