What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

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a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

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What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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