A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

Sex

Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

What african eat for christmas Sand.

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...