What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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