Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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